My Current Relationship

Since I was 14 years old I haven’t spent more than 6 months without a romantic interest. I have had three semi-serious boyfriends and most recently got out of a very serious two year, long-term relationship. I have learned a lot from these relationships but I have missed out on one very crucial thing throughout the years, being alone. I have started a new personal journey, dating myself. I am channeling all energy I would have otherwise poured into a romantic relationship into time with myself. I am navigating my way through the kitchen and leaSex in the Cityrning how to cook. Taking time to invest myself in books and think deeper about my place in the world. I am also getting back into yoga and meditation, while also spending more time in the gym releasing those endorphins. My goal is to love and appreciate myself. To take the advice of my favorite fictional character, and fall in love with myself.

December 12th Update: The past months I have made a balanced dinner every Thursday night without using the microwave…most nights (a moment to bask in my self gloating…I am way too proud of myself). I have read a few books. Yes Please! by Amy Poehler is highly recommended by me…and many other famous people. I have worked my ass off at school this semester and achieving my highest college GPA. I have found a lot of meaning in giving my time to others through volunteering at Dress for Success (check the blog posts!) and donating to those in need. My friends think I am crazy for pulling over on the side of a road giving people clothes and food from my car and talking with them, but that’s okay, I don’t mind. I find so much joy in giving that I almost think it is selfish.  Although I have been so busy with all these (great!) things, I have neglected a large part of my emotional wellbeing. I have cut myself off from the feelings of my passed relationship; I have left myself no time to even think about it, let alone feel it. While these feelings bubble to the surface, I find new ways to get more in touch with my emotional temperature; instead of suppressing them, like I have been.

It’s been real,
Cait

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